"It's fine. I've seen plenty of actual selfless people that have decision paralysis. Your will to live is admirable to me--someone who was forced by a passive mechanism to keep living no matter what the situation was and regardless of my own feelings. That said, I think wanting to live is normal. That's what people do, after all. They live and want to stay alive to fulfill what they want to do."

[ For a moment, it looks like Ellis's green eyes aren't looking at Mishka, but rather through him. He's sure seeing flashbacks that make him space out for a second. ]

"So, if you want to live at the expense of everyone else, you should do it."

[ ellis really said 'fuck everyone else' ]