crescentview | 🌸FALL CATCHALL🌸

[ Is she thriving? She supposes that it's easy to think as much, when she's standing here in the midst of all of her hard work. But the truth is that everything is a work in progress. She's not a perfect businesswoman by any means. Half of the time, she doesn't really know what she's doing. All she really knows is that she hopes her flowers will bring some light into people's lives. It's all she's ever strived to do, just like with her magic. But at the end of the day, who knows if she's succeeding or thriving, when it comes to things like profits... It is all a work in progress. This endeavor is a work in progress.

Herself and M-21 - they are a work in progress.

And her friendships, too. A work in progress, just like this. And that's why sometimes, it hurts so, so much. ]

...It's alright. You... You weren't yourself yesterday, were you?

[ Even though he had kept insisting that he was just fine. She wants to believe that was part of whatever magic was at play. ]

That doesn't matter!!

[A brief rise in pitch, a knee-jerk reaction, before his fists clench at his sides. He hates this, letting the actions if a self he didn't want to acknowledge slide under the rug as though it didn't affect people. He couldn't do that. He couldn't accept that for himself.]

I... it's not alright, Ori. I know it's not. The things I said to you, how I treated you and spoke to you and ignored what you tried to say... none of that was right.

I hurt you. It doesn't matter how I was thinking, I still hurt you, and didn't give you the respect your words deserved...

[He swallows tightly, bowing at the waist with his head dipped low. His fists shake against his knees.]

I damaged this. Us. With my reckless treatment. And I... I'm sorry.

[ She squeezes at the flowers in her arms again when his voice pitches up, startled by the emotion charged in his words, and already her lips are parted, ready to insist that it's really alright—

But... It's not, isn't it? He's right. She'd felt so hurt - feels so hurt - because he'd pushed her away at every turn. Took her kind words and turned them against her, and made her feel so... unwanted. Despised. ]

...You're right. It's not... It's not alright. But... it also wasn't your fault. I can't hold it against you, when you weren't yourself. I can't.

[ She sets the flowers down on the counter and then walks up to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. ]

I just need to know... if there's any part of you that feels the same way as the you from yesterday did.

[ If he resents her for her kindness, if he truly thinks she'll never be able to understand him... Or even if he truly meant what he'd said when he ate her chocolate. ]

[It's a solid weight of a question, and he falls silent. He knows, now, how heavily she worries over everything, how no matter what he says she might just twist upon herself to think of what she might have done wrong. It paralyzes him in return for the longest moment. What does he even say, to help her without watching her possibly fall apart at his words?

...

But...

What can he say, other than the truth? She deserves the truth. And even if he's aware of it... he can never be in control over her worry.

...

With a slow exhale, he lifts one of his own hands to lay atop her grip against him, a careful touch as brown eyes stay towards the floor.]

I... felt a lot yesterday.

I don't understand a lot of it. I don't agree with some of it. But some of it, I...

...

[He exhales again, taking her hand in his and bringing it in front of them.]

If... I had to tell you, over and over again, how much I love your kindness... how you light an entire room up by being gentle and caring, and how you always go out of your way to care for everybody else...

How brave you try to be, even when things scare or hurt you. How you try your best to solve what you can, even at the detriment of yourself. How deeply you feel things, and how sensitive you are to everything, and how you never think twice about using that as anything but a tool for good.

...

I'd tell you. I'll always tell you. Even if I cracked and broke under the pressure of it.

[ The uncertainty that wraps around his entire demeanor as he stands in her shop today is... achingly familiar. She remembers this kind of confusion, the feeling of a hundred different things she'd done in a day all in a haze, coming back to her like the memories of an entirely different person. It's not the same, not at all, especially when you compare the kinds of days they had. But it's enough to make her listen to his words in earnest. He recounts what he'd said after eating her chocolate, almost verbatim - no, better than verbatim - and she finds herself recounting her own words in her mind, too, as they fall into a thick, contemplative silence.

The Ori that Otegine had seen in her memories would have all too easily brushed these words aside, and told him that he's being too kind, that she doesn't deserve it. Even now, she resists the urge to feel that his words are meant for another, for some other version of herself that couldn't possibly be the real her. But she has learned, since those days when she was so unsure of herself, to accept these words. Even if she doesn't believe in it fully, or all the time. She has learned that it's enough to know others believe in her, and her faith in those people is what guides her. In those dark days, it was her love and loyalty for her friends who so fervently wanted her to come into her own that helped her accept what she could be - what they saw her to be.

She only wishes she could be the same for him. But she realizes, thinking back on what the Otegine of yesterday had told her, that she can be obtuse. That there are things she may never truly understand. It hurt so much to hear it at the time, but... Maybe it's okay if she doesn't understand. Maybe she never will understand. The most important thing is for her to be able to be the kind of friend that Otegine needs - not the kind of friend that she thinks he needs.

After a while, she takes a deep breath. She moves her hands in his to grasp at them and give them a gentle squeeze. ]

Otegine... That means a lot to me. Really. And, I... I have to apologize, too. I was... Stubborn, yesterday. I didn't mean to brush aside how you were feeling about some of the things I said. I think I was confused by how you were acting, but still, I... I should have listened.

Eh?

[She's apologizing?

He doesn't interrupt her, letting the warmth of his hands stay steady in her grip.]

Ori... no, no, it's okay. Don't feel bad about anything you said yesterday.

Just because I wasn't thinking straight doesn't mean you did anything wrong, or that you didn't try to understand! Even if you'd done everything perfectly... I don't think I would have listened. Not like that.

[He tries to lean down, to get a good look at her, to catch her gaze with his own.]

Please... I know it's easier said than done, but don't start blaming yourself. I'm not going to.

[ She doesn't shy away from his gaze, at least, even if what he's met with is a bit trepidatious, but still a bit relieved in equal measure from hearing that he'd meant his kind words, that she didn't mess things up completely on her end. ]

You may say that, but still, I... I want to be a good friend to you, Otegine. Some of the other things you said yesterday about me are... True, too. Sometimes I focus so much on others that I forget to have that same kindness for myself. I respect what you have to say, even if yesterday you weren't... Saying them the way you would, right now.

But I really, really hope that we can take care of each other. That you'll let others take care of you, too.

[ She still remembers how he'd been at the auction, being made to listen and support everyone at every turn. And what his application had said - what had spurred her to bid on him, even if she didn't win in the end. ]

So... Can we still be friends...?

Was there ever any question?

[A light laugh, a boyish smile, a relief in his eyes, to hear her want to treat herself the way she treats others. It eases his heart a bit, even if he still thinks she's being a little too hard on herself.]

Of course we can, Ori. I'm honored to be a friend of yours.

Just... promise me something, okay?

[ It eases her heart, too, to hear him laugh a little. ]

I'm honored, too!

[ Though at his question, she tips her head to one side. ]

Hmm? What is it...?

[He leans in a little, a dry look on his face.]

If I ever treat you like that again, you knock my teeth out. Okay?

[ Right. Knock his teeth out. That sounds perfectly reasonable— ]

W-What?! No...!

Let's... Let's just hope the Goddess doesn't do that to you again, for everyone's sake...

[ Though, now that he's leaned in, she can see... Are those marks on his neck? ]

...Oh.

No, I'm serious! Ori, I promise, I never want to treat you like that again. Don't let me.

[But then she trails off, staring. There are indeed colored bruisings past the neckline of his sweater, though Otegine doesn't quite catch what she's suddenly staring at.]

Is... something wrong?

I...

[ Somewhere in her mind sits a response, wherein she tells him that she's hopeful that he'll never treat her that way again. But it's lost to the ether when she is caught staring at his neck.

She looks away, her cheeks reddening slightly. ]

Um, not... necessarily? It's just, uh... Your neck, Otegine.

[Oh...

Oh. Shit.

He straightens up immediately, slapping a hand against where he knows Syr had pointed out marks earlier.]

I... s-sorry. I didn't... u-um...

[Wow the far wall SURE IS INTERESTING let's keep our eyes glued over there...

...

When he finally manages to find his words, his tone drags roughly with embarrassment.]

...

I... l-like I said... I really, really need you to punch my teeth in next time. Please. It's am act of mercy, I promise. He... didn't get up to anything good.

Edited 2023-03-05 05:33 (UTC)

[ Goodness... He, uh, sure got up to some things after leaving her in tears in here yesterday, huh... Well, then. She can't do anything but take it in stride, now. It's not like she didn't get up to somewhat similar things last night, so... ]

S-Sorry. I didn't mean to draw attention to them. But, um... I can offer a little healing spell for you, if you'd rather not walk around all day with them...

[Immediately:]

Please.

It's not like it was anything bad, but I... uh-- I'm getting kind of embarrassed of people asking about it already, s-so...

I'd appreciate it.

Of course... Ready?

[ Ori casts a questioning glance up at Otegine as she casts her spell, causing her hand to glow with a warm, radiant, comforting light as she reaches over to rest it gently just below his jawline, on his neck.

Otegine will feel that modest bit of healing energy seemingly seep through into him and spread, and in just a short moment the marks on his neck and likely... elsewhere... will fade. Sorry Owen. ]

How's that?

[ She motions at a small mirror on the wall somewhere in her shop, if he wants to check... ]

[The gesture to the mirror is waved down, the spear just turning more red in the process.]

N-no, it's okay! I trust you.

[Nothing really hurt all that much, but the ones that noticably did he can feel fading rather fast, just like the magic from his saniwa fixing up the chips and cracks from battle. Not an unusual sensation, but rather a different flavor of one.]

Sorry, I-- I know that was kind of awkward. I, um...

Can we keep that between us?

[ Her hand finally falls away from his face, and it's just as well so she can rest her hands on her hips and nod. ]

My lips are sealed. And it's alright, Otegine. I'm realizing that I can't get stressed out about all of the, um... Shenanigans that comes out of these things. Otherwise every day would be stressful...

[ Oh, but, she does look up at him with another questioning look in her eyes. ]

...Do you want to hug it all out?

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