crescentview | 🔪 i'm a fish inside a birdcage; open with some closed prompts

🔪 i'm a fish inside a birdcage; open with some closed prompts

🔪 WHO: Akechi and anyone who chooses to tolerate him (I'm sorry).
🔪 WHAT: December Shenanigans
🔪 WHEN: Nebulously December, possibly into January, time is fake.
🔪 WHERE: Wherever, whenever, we're meant to... No, actually.
🔪 WARNINGS: Strong language, emotional constipation, Childe, Twister. Any NSFW will be tagged within the thread but it may happen. Also Kaeya and Akechi are making out, so that's a thing.

🔪 b-b-b-bingo!

[Frequently, Akechi can be found just about anywhere within Crescentview perched neatly on something chair-shaped. He has one leg folded over the other like a prick, one arm folded against his ribs and the elbow of the other resting on his wrist, allowing him to set his chin in his hand. It's a pretentious way to sit, but it's stable, and comfortable despite how it looks. He's poring over his Bingo card for the umpteenth time, and should anyone come within a five-foot radius of him, he snaps his head up.] For our mutual benefit, would you mind cross-referencing cards?

[He's made figurative copies of his card-- on the backs of old casework from his briefcase, he's hand-written out a few lists of squares, content to always ignore the smut squares when interacting with anyone. His penmanship is neat and concise, and there are occasional footnotes alongside them.]

🔪 mountainside farming

[He has no idea how to be a farmer. He has no idea how to be self-sufficient without the internet and a paycheck garnered from murder, he's realizing, but he does have a vague know-how of a variety of things included in farming. Planting seeds, for instance, he has some degree of understanding of. His farm is set away from others, blissfully allowing him solitude, but by no means unreachable or even remotely difficult to find. He's found some old shitty tools and an old shitty sun hat, and his slacks are rolled up to his knees. He's given up on his shirt entirely, given it's white, and his shoes and socks are somewhere out of eyesight, leaving him barefoot and shirtless attempting to tear up the earth for planting things with a rusted old backhoe. There is only so much his shitty little twink arms can handle, someone want to teach him proper technique?]

pt. 2; paddle boats. [Childe]

[At some point he's given up on tearing up his land, and is standing at the bank of a small lake near his farm. More specifically, he's staring at a paddle boat just chilling, rope-tied to a questionable dock. It's pretty gnarly, covered in grime and algae, but if there's one thing Goro is relatively decent at in household tasks, it's cleaning.]

[Tartaglia will find him scooping water in and out of the thing, the legs of his slacks still rolled up to his knees-- not that it really matters anymore, given he's basically swimming fully clothed. His hair is tied back with some kind of twine into a dinky-ass little ponytail, and he pauses with some manner of bucket half-poured into the second bucket seat of the boat to look up at the ginger.] Does your staring serve a purpose, or should I pretend you're less conspicuous? I don't believe we've met.

pt. 3; twister. [Lucia]

[He's yet to figure out how to solve the issue of proper lighting, so he's moved his bizarre find while dusting out to the front yard of his plot of land. Said bizarre find, as it happens, is a classic old game known as Twister, in a banged-up old square cardboard box. It's simple enough, the spin-board in tact and the mat suffering only a few questionable stains, and Goro is seated cross-legged beside the mat reading the instructions for what has to be the fourth time. It's a very straightforward game, but he keeps waiting for something to leap out at him from between the lines to make it more complicated.]

[Movement in his peripheral vision catches his attention and he angles his head toward it, but his eyes remain on the paper until he finishes the sentence he was in the middle of reading. His eyes then meet Lucia's, and after a beat of silence, she can likely see the gears in his little rat brain turning. A slow grin pulls his mouth crooked.] Care to test something with me?

🔪 wildcard

[Akechi spends most of his time at his farm to avoid others, trying to figure out how to make this whole farming thing work without being sociable or accepting, much less asking for, help. His plotting post can be found here, but I'm open for literally anything. I can make additional prompts or you can toss me whatever you like! Please harass my shitlord. :>b]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Didn't know I needed one.

[ Not like he's the least bit penitent wandering about, staring perhaps longer than necessary. He's pretty spontaneous on his own merits, governed by nothing like the chokehold of reason to get him to behave longer than necessary. Tartaglia shrugs, flippant to the concerns posed by watching this stranger un-sink his... paddleboat? ]

You looked like you could use some company! And some help, if you're willing to take mine.

[Those sure are a few very different responses. Childe gets his full attention with the shift in mannerisms, and he perches on the edge of the paddleboat carefully, crossing his arms.]

You don't, I suppose. I certainly don't, [Need company or help, that is--] But I suppose if you're here and offering there's little sense in me refusing assistance. I'm aiming to not use cleaning agents, both for being in limited supply and not wanting to harm wildlife by getting them in the water, but... I suppose, if you're willing, hauling this out of the water might be easier with two people.

[ Wow, that's a mouthful. To that, Childe's smile only broadens as he crosses the rest of the way over. ]

A simple "sure, come aboard!" would've sufficed. Luckily for you, I do have some experience dealing with boats.

[ His family was in the possession of several dinghies, even if this one is a bit more peculiar than most. Delicately maneuvering his way onto this little vessel for two, he grabs another bucket and gets to scooping. ]

See any leaks? As long as the exterior hasn't rotted through, we should be able to keep it floating just fine.

[There's a meme that says "I want to be mysterious so bad but I cannot shut the fuck up" with Akechi and I cannot find it, so envision it here, please.]

[Akechi's expression is somewhat nonplussed, in both of its meanings, but he doesn't object to Childe's clamboring onto his newfound swan boat. He scoops water with him in silence for a moment before shaking his head, perching on the back of the seat he's hovering over.] No, it's... I'm not sure if the term is "sea-worthy", because if anyone took this out to sea they'd surely die. But it's functional, just dirty.

[ for you, my liege ]

All the better! We won't have to worry about getting stranded. Oh, but I'd still rush in to rescue you, if you needed that. [ Can't let someone this interesting drown so unceremoniously. ] You don't mind if I give it a quick rinse, do you?

[ Mild splash zone incoming, but Childe's throwing out his hydro powers to rinse off the dirt. From an outsider's perspective, it probably just looks like he's holding an invisible water hose or something, angling his hands to blast away the grime caking the seats and floor before relenting to scoop out more of the water. ]

[Yes that exactly thank you.]

[One eyebrow quirks, nearly disappearing into Akechi’s shaggy fringe, and he’s about to protest the thought of needing to be rushed in and saved when Childe abruptly just manipulates water, like what the actual fuck. He stays still and looks from the newly-clean area of the boat back to Childe and back a few times, setting his bucket down.]

…how did you do that?

Oh, curious? I'll show you my Vision. It's no secret.

[ Childe unclips the gem pinned to his belt to show it off, cool to the touch. ]

With it, I wield some degree of control over water. [ Conjuring it is just another ordinary feat for him. ] Although... if given the option, I'd much prefer to use it in combat.

[ It does come in handy for tending to crops, though. Cleaning seafaring vessels is also another unexpected upside? Anyways, Childe's going to go ahead and continue hosing the paddleboat down until it's shiny and immaculate. ]

[Akechi doesn't reach out to touch it immediately, but he does lean toward it in curious interest. He shifts just his eyes without moving his head up to look at Childe's face when he mentions his preference for using it in combat, and grins as he sits back.]

What sort of combat? [You've got his attention now, Tartaglia.]

Oh, all kinds. I hope to master them all, eventually.

[ The change is immediate on Tartaglia's face, standing in this landlocked vessel and no longer gazing down at the boat. No longer staring at much of anything, really, except his companion as he addresses this stranger coolly, even though he's sizing him up like he would an opponent due for a reckoning. ]

... I don't remember catching your name. [ Ahaha, wow. Fighting words. ] Are you good for it?

[ Want to go to pieces with him? He has enough sense to not suggest they go head-to-head here, but it comes down to it, he won't evade a challenge. ]

[His grin remains. It's slight, it's not too telling, but it's just obvious enough, and not at all rattled by Childe's sudden monofocus. He perches on the back of the seat again, glancing away only long enough to take stock of the paddle boat and the fact that it really is quite clean now before he looks back up to meet his eyes.]

Goro Akechi. [He extends a hand.] I'm not fool enough to challenge a man with an affinity for water surrounded by it, if that answers your question.

Childe. Or Tartaglia, as I'm sometimes known. Address me however you wish. [ Coy with the smile, Childe nonetheless returns the handshake. What's immediately noticeable is how firm his grip is, like it's encased in steel or ruthlessness only barely-suppressed. ] We'll have to save it for later, then.

[ The advantage may prove too egregious here. Childe drops back into the one of the two empty, still-drying seats, smiling again as he places a sole on each pedal. ]

Weren't you going to tell me what forms of combat you excel in? It's no fair if I give you everything at once.

[ What moves that heart, Goro? ]

[Odd names, both of them, but-- Akechi doesn't question him. The handshake is noticeably A Lot, but he doesn't comment on it, either, simply logging away the barely-restrained something in his grip for later.]

[When he puts his feet on the pedals, Goro sinks into the seat beside him and follows suit, overall familiar with paddle boats but having no personal experience with them. He hums in thought.] Close-range, with a sword, or long-range with a pistol, generally. I've less of an affinity for a specific element, unfortunately. [Because Almighty isn't really an element, just brute, vicious force.]

[ Nothing else for it. Childe gets to pedaling, much like a virtuous, upstanding member of society who hasn't committed a number of war crimes on behalf of the Tsaritsa's ambition. It's fine. ]

Firearms proficiency, huh... that skill isn't common where I'm from. [ Technology that advanced hasn't been brought into mass production in Teyvat as of yet. ] I've favored bows as of late, although my fondness lies with close quarters.

[ Summoning his current weapon of choice takes nothing: a flick of his wrist and the bow appears in his hand. It's a bright, aberrant thing, ornamental in nature, as though gifted to him on appearance alone over any particular utility. Very deadly, though. Judging by the worn-down grooves down the grip, it's apparently been used to damaging effect. ]

Give me a target. I'll hit it.

[Listen they can be war criminals for stupid reasons together and never say a word of it to one another. It's fine!]

[Akechi watches him sidelong as they pedal along, humming wordlessly to the notion of a bow. P5 chose violence and didn't give us any bow users, so he's not actively familiar, but it's probably something he'd have considered taking as an elective in school if he hadn't been too busy being a psychological assassin. He watches as Childe summons his bow, his eyebrows making a bid for space at the literal conjuring of it from approximately nowhere, but is quick to scan the horizon for a target.]

[He leans close enough to almost bump their shoulders, but specifically avoids it, only moving that close to allow Tartaglia to follow his line of sight where he points at-- probably some kind of large bird. Picture it like a far-off azure crane, Childe.] I've always been curious about archery. [Impress him, buddy.]

[ Psychological assassination is valid. Were he capable of that on any level, he'd utilize that tactic himself. Instead, Childe nocks the strung line of it back— no quiver for arrows, but he doesn't really need that, his Vision conjures up what's necessary. ]

Remember where it is. Keep it in your line of sight. [ Bad posture, poor stance aside, it's a predestined outcome that he'll strike his target full in the thinnest part of his throat and kill it outright. ] ... After this, let's find it together.

[ Ending its life so meaninglessly should still have some inherent value. Childe's gaze doesn't waver at all. The thing is, none of him does. He merely fires it, as soon as he's charged the shot; the arrow glimmers, irradiated with light, so fast that it's a blur streaking across the sky. It takes a high, high arc, and it strikes that beautiful crane and cuts its existence short.

It's over in a couple of seconds, the form of that gorgeous bird caught mid-flight and tumbling down, dead before it's even finished its plummet. ]

I'm still unskilled. Actually, I've found it rather difficult to master. [ Archery has never come easily to him. ] Even so, I learned how to use the bow. So it isn't too late for you.

[ The implication's unspoken, but still there: he's willing to teach Goro, if he finds himself willing to suffer through Childe's horrible tutelage. ]

[Akechi keeps his gaze on the bird, flicking it briefly to Childe as he aims, fires-- there was no arrow, but then there's a strange glimmer, like light catching water, and he looks at the crane again just before it hits its mark. Watches it drop lifelessly out of sight with a strangely distant expression, Childe's voice pulling him out of his momentary trance.]

Unskilled, and you just hit a moving target from several meters away. [He's still looking at where the after-image of the crane as it was struck seems burned on the insides of his eyelids. He turns to Childe after mulling over the suggestion.]

Are you offering to instruct me?

Are you willing to take it?

[ In many respects, he'd just be subpar, passing on only what he knows. Acknowledging his own limits is the only way Tartaglia can exceed them. ]

My master could hit twice as far without looking, after all. [ Skirk truly was terrifying. Up until now, he still can't get her to use more than a single hand before she utterly annihilates him in battle. ] Though I'm happy to be of service. Who knows? Perhaps you'll surpass me and ascend to the heights she has.

[ When it comes down to it, Tartaglia is oh-so-fond of racking up favors from other people. ]

Since you can't use mine, you'll have to gather what you need. [ Can't exactly utilize a weapon whose power draws from another source entirely. One snap of his fingers, and the bow's gone. ] One more lap around the lake, then?

[ You know, before they go bird-hunting. ]

[Sir, must you really word it so suggestively?]

[Goro hums, his eyebrows attempting lift off from his face at the idea of someone hitting a target twice as far as the bird Childe had just hit without looking, but-- He might be able to manage a similar feat with a pistol, at least in the Metaverse, and people weren't given the moniker "master" for no reason.]

[He considers him a while, his pedaling having slowed while he mulls the whole idea over, and makes an affirmative sound to the question, returning to pedaling in earnest. He's quiet another handful of seconds before he nods, smiling crookedly and looking out to where the bird had fallen.] Archery seems a very useful skill, and if there's one thing I've learned being here, it's that this so-called Goddess rewards both learning how to live off the land, and teaching and learning new things, in equal measure.

[He angles his head toward Childe and offers him his left hand to shake.] I'll see what I can come up with for a bow and some arrows, if you'd be willing to teach me the basics.

[ You betcha. ]

Were you seeking out her approval that badly? [ Evading curses sounds more pragmatic, but Childe quizzically glances down at that hand, boat rocking and swaying beneath them both. C'mon, Goro. Hobbies can be plenty fulfilling in their own right. ] ... On one condition, then. If you're doing it for anyone, then why not do it for yourself?

[ After that, he'll relent to the handshake, signifying this little contract of theirs as sealed. The rest of this paddle boat ride around the length of the lake lapses into silence. At the end of the lap, Childe's mustered up a couple more questions. ]

What'll you do, once you learn? Any targets in mind?

[ Can't particularly imagine Goro as an inveterate bird-killer, but bows are a whole lot less noisy than firearms if he heads down the route that ends in murder. ]

[A derisive snort, and he shakes his head.] Not in the least, but meeting some of her requirements is the easiest way to have a livable plot of land, unfortunately, given I lack the ability to reform it on my own.

[He gives Childe a sort of confused frown and shrugs, nodding as he takes his hand.] I haven't anyone but myself to do anything for.

[He looks away at the question, thoughtful, and shakes his head.] Likely just hunting, to feed myself. [He's probably done with murder? It's hard to say.]

That's something anyone can relate to. [ Doing things simply for the sake of survival, outside of pleasure or hedonism, is understandable. ] But you can always ask for help.

[ Stepping off the paddleboat and into the embankment, Childe freely extends a hand to Akechi, all too willing to return to dry land. ]

Let's get going?

[ To bury that bird Childe killed. He will let Goro off the hook now, though, if he decides he'd rather get straight to gathering the necessary supplies he'll need for the lesson. ]

[He doesn't address that, because no, Childe, he absolutely cannot ask for help. Cannot, and will not.]

[The offer of his hand directly following such a suggestion is timed in such a way it makes Goro pause, and he has to consciously bite back the immediate desire to smack his hand away and climb out of the boat with some kind of nasty comment about pity. This wasn't pity, none of these people knew any of the things he had done, be they positive or negative. There were no preconceived notions.]

[He takes his hand and hauls himself out of the boat.] Thank you, [And he looks after where the bird had fallen.] ...with your arrow having been... conjured water, is there evidence of a weapon used?

[ Good thing Childe caught absolutely none of that inner turmoil, or he might be a touch more concerned here. Not enough to actually do anything, but the point still stands. ]

It doesn't leave a trace, although it works functionally the same as any weapon. [ Starting down the path, Childe's quick about it, his pace unbroken by anything like hesitation. ] You'll see what I mean when we arrive.

[ However long that journey takes, the evidence is clear as day, lying in the middle of a grassy clearing. For all intents and purposes, the crane does appear to be nocked with an arrow. No physical proof of it remains, save for the puncture wound, shot clean through the heart. Childe doesn't bother kneeling down to assess the damage, although Goro's welcome to approach the bird. ]

Does that answer your question?

[Akechi is unfortunately a very concerning individual, so it's for the best that Childe completely ignore those things.]

[He's quiet as they traverse the ground en route to the fallen bird, outside of a curious hum, until they arrive. He does, in fact, approach the bird, sinking into a crouch in front of it and curling one hand into a loose fist, index knuckle resting against his lips. Doesn't leave a trace, outside of the puncture wound, but certainly did work functionally the same as a physical arrow shot from a physical bow. The ones of water were still physical, he supposed, but still water, in that they evaporated when no longer needed.]

[Another hum, and he looks up curiously to Childe.] Do you figure it's edible? It's your kill regardless, but when living off the land I'm uncertain if a burial is more or less correct an action than utilizing all of what is presented. [He's sure he could find a use for the feathers, if nothing else.]

[ He just didn't catch it. But Childe can't overlook something this blatant, this sign of moral decency informing him on Goro's nature that's probably always been lurking beneath any propensity to fight. It's an odd feeling; it kind of sticks in his throat, and he remains where he stands in the clearing, unable to shake the idea that he's trespassing on this moment. ]

You're rather soft.

[ Not like it's better or worse than killing anything else. If Childe takes his bow to anything, it's usually premeditated: with a purpose, with the willingness to accept the consequences. If he can, he'd rather avoid indiscriminate murder. ]

... It's wild game. I've never eaten crane. [ Probably a little dense to swallow, not wholly palatable. ] Breast meat's a safe bet, at least. [ Childe gathers the bird up in his arms. The death was clean, barely any blood to be seen. ] If you want to take it with you, then I'll help. Where's your farm?

warning: childe

listen,

i'm listening

he needs his own warning and you know it

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no, really, we're ignoring the porn icons.

ur such a tease 👐 opens my arms to blushy akechi

i could go back and remake them with less blushing but what's the fun in that

i lov his blushing, don't nerf his power

he deserves to be nerfed in every way possible tho

just you wait, i'm gonna save him from those nerfs

his hero.

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there he goes again

😳

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