🔪 i'm a fish inside a birdcage; open with some closed prompts

[forfeited]

🔪 WHO: Akechi and anyone who chooses to tolerate him (I'm sorry).
🔪 WHAT: December Shenanigans
🔪 WHEN: Nebulously December, possibly into January, time is fake.
🔪 WHERE: Wherever, whenever, we're meant to... No, actually.
🔪 WARNINGS: Strong language, emotional constipation, Childe, Twister. Any NSFW will be tagged within the thread but it may happen. Also Kaeya and Akechi are making out, so that's a thing.



🔪 b-b-b-bingo!

[Frequently, Akechi can be found just about anywhere within Crescentview perched neatly on something chair-shaped. He has one leg folded over the other like a prick, one arm folded against his ribs and the elbow of the other resting on his wrist, allowing him to set his chin in his hand. It's a pretentious way to sit, but it's stable, and comfortable despite how it looks. He's poring over his Bingo card for the umpteenth time, and should anyone come within a five-foot radius of him, he snaps his head up.] For our mutual benefit, would you mind cross-referencing cards?

[He's made figurative copies of his card-- on the backs of old casework from his briefcase, he's hand-written out a few lists of squares, content to always ignore the smut squares when interacting with anyone. His penmanship is neat and concise, and there are occasional footnotes alongside them.]

🔪 mountainside farming

[He has no idea how to be a farmer. He has no idea how to be self-sufficient without the internet and a paycheck garnered from murder, he's realizing, but he does have a vague know-how of a variety of things included in farming. Planting seeds, for instance, he has some degree of understanding of. His farm is set away from others, blissfully allowing him solitude, but by no means unreachable or even remotely difficult to find. He's found some old shitty tools and an old shitty sun hat, and his slacks are rolled up to his knees. He's given up on his shirt entirely, given it's white, and his shoes and socks are somewhere out of eyesight, leaving him barefoot and shirtless attempting to tear up the earth for planting things with a rusted old backhoe. There is only so much his shitty little twink arms can handle, someone want to teach him proper technique?]

pt. 2; paddle boats. [Childe]

[At some point he's given up on tearing up his land, and is standing at the bank of a small lake near his farm. More specifically, he's staring at a paddle boat just chilling, rope-tied to a questionable dock. It's pretty gnarly, covered in grime and algae, but if there's one thing Goro is relatively decent at in household tasks, it's cleaning.]

[Tartaglia will find him scooping water in and out of the thing, the legs of his slacks still rolled up to his knees-- not that it really matters anymore, given he's basically swimming fully clothed. His hair is tied back with some kind of twine into a dinky-ass little ponytail, and he pauses with some manner of bucket half-poured into the second bucket seat of the boat to look up at the ginger.] Does your staring serve a purpose, or should I pretend you're less conspicuous? I don't believe we've met.

pt. 3; twister. [Lucia]

[He's yet to figure out how to solve the issue of proper lighting, so he's moved his bizarre find while dusting out to the front yard of his plot of land. Said bizarre find, as it happens, is a classic old game known as Twister, in a banged-up old square cardboard box. It's simple enough, the spin-board in tact and the mat suffering only a few questionable stains, and Goro is seated cross-legged beside the mat reading the instructions for what has to be the fourth time. It's a very straightforward game, but he keeps waiting for something to leap out at him from between the lines to make it more complicated.]

[Movement in his peripheral vision catches his attention and he angles his head toward it, but his eyes remain on the paper until he finishes the sentence he was in the middle of reading. His eyes then meet Lucia's, and after a beat of silence, she can likely see the gears in his little rat brain turning. A slow grin pulls his mouth crooked.] Care to test something with me?

🔪 wildcard

[Akechi spends most of his time at his farm to avoid others, trying to figure out how to make this whole farming thing work without being sociable or accepting, much less asking for, help. His plotting post can be found here, but I'm open for literally anything. I can make additional prompts or you can toss me whatever you like! Please harass my shitlord. :>b]

Comments

listen i knew what i was about and there is simply so much fodder

[forfeited]

[Goro hasn't moved from his own stance, one eye still squinted closed as he aims, and Gaku going on the offensive makes his grin pull sharp at the corners.]

Absolutely. From five as well?

i respect that so much, genuinely

[associative]

[ Oooh, another five. ]

Yeah, sounds great.

[ He steadies himself, pulling a pose like he's acting in an action drama. ]

[forfeited]

[Now they are Kamen Rider 555.]

[Goro's grin only grows at Gaku's stance-- he likes to see an opponent getting into their role, and takes two steps backward as he starts to count down.]

Five..., four..., three..., two...,

[He adjusts his hand on the trigger of his gun.] One. [And he's firing.]

[associative]

[ So is Gaku, but not until he dodges right out of the way. Unfortunately, with a 9 on the dice roll, Goro manages to hit him once. ]

Tch.

[ Here he goes, spritzing water at Goro. ]

[forfeited]

[I rolled once and got 1 and then rolled again and got 3 and cumulatively that means Gaku's aim is shit according to this D20. This is what happens when you challenge a psychological child assassin to a watergun fight, I guess? Akechi drops into a bizarre-looking crouch and then proceeds to roll like something out of Mission: Impossible, taking this entirely too seriously.]

That can't be your best shot, didn't you say your music group was called Trigger? [Ah yes, The Taunting.]

[associative]

[ Ah, taunting. It just makes Gaku laugh. ]

You're the one with knowledge about this, aren't you?

[ He shoots again, aiming down low at Akechi's head. ]

I think I deserve to be cut a little bit of slack.

[forfeited]

[With a solid 15 from the D20, Gaku gets him square in the head and Akechi exclaims in surprise, startled that immediately after he laughs about it.]

[He stands and holds his gun with both hands, pacing sideways without taking his eyes off his opponent.] Do you really want me to? If I take it easy on you, will it still feel like a victory if you win? [He swings his arms up sharply, aiming directly for Gaku's chest when he fires.]

[associative]

[ With an 18, that gets him square in the chest, water trailing down his shirt. That's two for Goro now. ]

You know, I'd rather you go all out. A win doesn't feel deserved if the other person is just letting it happen.

[forfeited]

[His grin pulls wider, shows teeth.] That's the spirit.

[Another shot, aimed for Gaku's shoulder this time. He'd already be dead, were real bullets at play, so it feels a little silly to go for non-vital spaces now, but he's still got three points to win.]

[associative]

[ After winning a 9 versus Gaku's 8 for dodging, Goro manages to land another hit. Gaku holds back a sigh. ]

Choosing you to do this with was a bad idea. You actually know how to aim.

[ But he's going to try his best anyway, quickly darting at Goro and shooting at him. ]

[forfeited]

[Goro barks a sharp laugh, but Gaku's hit lands, making them 3-2.]

I did mention my functional knowledge of handguns. You aren't doing too terribly, though! Perhaps I could show you a thing or two, when we're through here. [And he means that-- this is actually fun, for him, so Gaku is rapidly climbing the ranks of People Akechi Will Tolerate of His Own Volition.]

[associative]

You know what? Go ahead. It might make me a better fit for action roles when I go back.

[ He'd be one less idol they have to show how to hold a gun.

Gaku aims again at Goro, this time at his shoulder. ]

[forfeited]

[Another brassy little laugh, and with a 15 from the D20 for Gaku's aim and only a 6 for Goro's dodge, his whole shoulder is soaked. His grin is knife-sharp, and he swats some of the excess water from his shirt.]

Three for three, now. Action roles?

[His gun is held down for a moment, mentally he's reloading it. He's fidgeting with the plastic before he realizes he doesn't... need to do that, and raises it again to fire in a swift arc of his arm-- two shots, toward Gaku's torso and thigh.]

[associative]

[ With a 13 and 2, Goro manages to get a shot at Gaku's thigh. ]

Thee for four.

[ He aims at Goro's abdomen this time in an attempt to switch it up. ]

Yeah. Sometimes I play a spy on a drama.

[forfeited]

[RNG hates Gaku, who got a 1 somehow. How does this keep happening, Goro really needs to teach this man how to fire a gun. Goro's dodge rolls a 10, so he just sort of hops backward out of the line of fire, and looks up at Gaku with a raised eyebrow.] Well, I'll certainly teach you better aim, then.

[Maybe if he's a prick Gaku will get mad?? He shoots at one of his feet.]

[associative]

[ WOW it sure does! But he takes it in stride anyway. Compared to someone who obviously knows how to handle a gun, he isn't that mad.

...And with a 2, Goro manages to get his foot, some of the water seeping in through his shoe. Ew. ]

Yeah? Teach me now, since you just won.

[forfeited]

[At least there's that. Goro's grin flares wide and toothy, and he holds his watergun with both hands, lowered near his thigh as he moves back over to him.]

For one, stability is key if you want your shot to go where you aim it. If your hand shakes or you aren't certain, hold the butt of the gun with one hand with your preferred finger or fingers outside the trigger guard until you are prepared to fire. This is especially important with something that fires something more harmful than water. Use your other hand beneath that, so the recoil affects you less. [He shows Gaku his meaning with both his hands, one curled under the other and his index and middle fingers on the outside of the trigger guard. It feels a little silly with a watergun.]

[associative]

[ Gaku copies Akechi's pose, moving his hands exactly the way he's directed. ]

Like this?

[ It does feel steadier, even if this sort of handling isn't meant for a water gun whatsoever. ]

[forfeited]

[Not in the least, but Akechi is obnoxiously prone to taking things not meant to be taken seriously far too seriously. He looks over Gaku's stance, smiling faintly and using the end of his watergun to bump Gaku's upward.] Try to keep your arms straight forward, but not fully extended when you aren't firing. I can't believe someone would have expected you to play a spy without at least teaching you the basics.

[associative]

My usual role is stealing someone's girlfriend, spy or not.

[ He's just there to look hot, honestly.

But he takes this instruction seriously, keeping his arms straight, but not especially tense. ]

I'd like something more action-focused in the future, so if they don't need to train me on it, I might actually get a role.

[forfeited]

[He barks a startled little laugh before he can stop himself, because-- well. He can certainly see why that was at play. Shaking his head, he raises his own watergun and glances at Gaku to suggest he do the same.] Some target practice, then? If you're familiar with what is required to hit a target, it makes pretending to do so a more believable motion.

[associative]

[ Wow, Goro!! Thanks for that laugh! Gaku bites back a sigh. ]

Yeah, sure.

[ He'll aim right at Goro's shoulder. ]

Do I just keep this same position?

[forfeited]

[He's a prick, okay, he makes no attempt to hide this.]

[He allows the aim set on his shoulder, standing a little straighter and very still for the purpose. He nods, lowering his own gun.] The recoil on an actual weapon will shunt it back into your grip as you fire, which isn't something a watergun can replicate, but keep that in mind if you're cast in a role that uses something a bit more deadly.

[He would probably stand still for target practice with a real gun, too, actually.]

[associative]

They'll give me something that'll have recoil?

[ He presses the trigger, shooting some water at Goro. ]

I thought it'd just be a prop or something...

[forfeited]

I suppose it depends on the nature of the role, and whoever has assigned it. Some agencies will want you to be aware of the actual behavior you're imitating, though I imagine it would be more likely they'd send you to a firing range.

[He doesn't flinch when the water hits him, a bit lower on his arm than his shoulder. He smiles.] The next thing to consider is trajectory-- any projectile will have velocity to consider, based on the weight of what you're firing and the speed it's being propelled, so... [He reaches out, waving his hand in an upward motion twice.] Raise the gun about two inches and try again.