December Open Post/Catch All/Overflow

[winebar]

Who: Van Zieks and whoever
What: General catch all for bingos and other effects
When: December
Where: Various
Warnings: TBA

Something has gone terribly wrong? (December 9th)
[You are just minding your own business, walking on the beach, or through the wood, when you hear what is certainly an unfamiliar laugh. If you look around, you'll soon attach it to... van Zieks? No, this can't be him. He's smiling. He's barefoot and covered in dirt. His hair isn't immaculately combed back and he's simply wearing a loose cotton shirt with his tight lawyer pants, though he does have a sword now hanging at his waist, which is new. This cannot be van Zieks. Even the cadence of his voice is lacking his normal ominous grit, but the voice is certainly his otherwise.]

Oh, come here! I have something to show you.
[Seriously who the hell is this and what did he do with the real van Zieks???]

Nevermind, Uncle has the Depression Again (December 10th)
[The following day, van Zieks is back in his austere best, looking more glowery and somber than ever before, like he's making up for the time he lost yesterday. You may find him at his usual haunt in the darkest corner of the winery, OR if you're wandering around in the woods, you might find him surveying the plot of land on his farm, or rather, the chaos that the him of the day before wreaked, which is to say, something was done to the plots, but it's hard to tell if it was anything constructive because they're upturned earth everywhere. Van Zieks is leaning heavily on the shovel he's holding, looking tired.]

Let me know if you have something specific in mind for bingo
[Hit me up on discord or on plurk agentmaine]

Comments

Dec 9

[framestory]

[ Ellis doesn't have to particularly hear anything to know what something is horribly wrong with van Zieks when he sees him so... so happy? Seeing people happy is one thing but this feels so strange to him based on what he's seen so far. Unfortunately, their eyes meet and Ellis walks over. What is van Zieks going to show him...?

There can't be much at the beach, right? ]

[winebar]

[Everything is fine this is normal don't worry about it. As he approaches van Zieks, the tall, formerly ominous man is still smiling, and once he's close enough, van Zieks is scooping Ellis up and throwing him into the water, still laughing. Fucking get pranked, idiot.]

[framestory]

[ At first, Ellis is shocked when van Zieks scoops him up, because huh? What did he do?! But then he's tossed into the water and he shrieks loudly. Sorry, but this guy has no volume control.

He'd think this was revenge for what Ellis did in their first interaction, but he's... laughing so much. He thinks. Ellis doesn't think he's crying, at least so that's a good sign. But now he's soaked and tries to get out of the water unless van Zieks feels like shoving him back?? ]

[winebar]

[No he is allowed to emerge from the water (for now). Van Zieks is grinning.]

How is it? Cold, I bet!
[There's so much life in his eyes.]

dec 9

[calla]

[ While going on a nice stroll through the forest, Kaeya spots... hm, something very strange. He's being beckoned in by a man who looks like he's having a mental breakdown. ]

And what's that?

[ Well, gonna follow anyway. ]

[winebar]

[STOP HE'S HAVING A NICE TIME WHY DO YOU EQUATE THAT TO MENTAL BREAKDOWN!!!]

Mmmm, it's a secret. You'll just have to follow me.
[It feels like that's probably a bad idea in this situation? Kaeya why are you doing this.]

[calla]

[ THE MERE FACT THAT HE'S HAVING A GOOD TIME MEANS THAT HE'S HAVING A MENTAL BREAKDOWN ]

All right, let's see what this secret is.

[ He has some free time anyway so he will follow! Just to see how far this man's breakdown goes. ]

[winebar]

[THAT'S SO BLEAK, KAEYA YOU JUST MET THIS MAN DO YOU REALLY THINK HE'S THAT MISERABLE???]

Aah!
[And van Zieks will lead Kaeya... right into a snare trap!! That said, even if Kaeya does step in it, it's not nearly properly set up enough to actually string him up. It just sorta. Tightens around his foot and hangs there taught. Maybe he'd fall over if he keeps walking but....]

... It didn't work?

December 9th...

[esurientabyss]

[ . . .

What the— ]

...What do you mean.

[ What happened to this guy? Could it be someone is impersonating him?? ]

[winebar]

[He laughs.]

What do YOU mean what do I mean?
[What a silly question!!!!]

[esurientabyss]

[ Can it be? That this is a first time in all of the centuries—beyond the time he had tasted a certain unfortunate god's bad cooking—that he, He Xuan, one of the Great Calamities, Black Water Sinks Ships...is actually unnerved? ]

...Who are you?

[ And what have you done to the real lawyer. Freaking bodysnatcher or soulswapper. ]

[winebar]

[He Xuan: I fear no man. But that thing... (cut to van Zieks, but smiling) it scares me.]

Hm. We've already met, you know. You can't have already forgotten my name! It's Barok van Zieks!

dec10

[forfeited]

[Akechi is a shitty farmer. He has no idea what he's doing, but he refuses to admit that or ask anyone to help him. So he's taken to skulking around other people's properties every so often, watching to see what they do and discern what he could adapt to his own abilities and land.]

[So he's going to just genuinely ignore the entirety of what he saw on the 9th, in favor of checking the aftermath on the 10th. He chooses to approach only then, his own shovel resting on one shoulder.] Need a hand? [When in doubt: bullshit.]

[winebar]

[Yes lets all just collectively forget the previous day happened. van Zieks is very on board for that. van Zieks isn't displeased to see Akechi, but he does sigh at the question.]

I wouldn't deign to trouble you with something like this, I hardly know where to start.

[forfeited]

[Akechi looks around the perplexing mess of churned earth and drops the head of his shovel into a patch of it, resting his shoe against the flat part of it to drive it just enough down it stands up when not held.]

My typical go-to is the internet, and with that not being an option here I'm thoroughly uncertain of how to do most basic farming tasks. I suppose you are in good company in that regard. [But no other regard, because Akechi simply is not good company.]

[winebar]

[While commiseration isn't exactly unideal, he's a bit distracted.]

What on earth is an internet? Detective Ryuki mentioned that at one point as well.
[Oh no.]

dec 9... as well.........

[sluice]

[ This is how they meet, apparently: in the woods, with Childe so incredibly blasé about being approached by a barefoot stranger. The sword receives little beyond a single glance-over from him. ]

Sure! What do you have to show me?

[ Here he goes to accompany van Zieks wherever fate leads them. ]

[winebar]

[HELP NOT THIS AS A FIRST MEETING....]

Oh, you'll see. It's great!
[Luckily the secrecy won't last for long. If Childe is watching his step carefully, he might spot the pitfall trap before falling in. Otherwise he's falling into the fucking hole that was covered with leaves and other forest floor debris. Up to you!]

[sluice]

[ It's all very cursed. Tragically, Childe would notice the hole straightaway, but let's just say he falls in partially, long enough to assume that he's succumbed to gravity and is now lying at the very bottom of the pit. If van Zieks looks inside, though, he'll find Childe with weird, shifty water-like daggers plunged into the earthen walls like makeshift climbing holds, keeping him from tumbling any further down. ]

That wasn't very nice!

[ Oh, no? He's coming back up? Throw leaves in his face before Childe makes his way to the top, one stab in the dirt at a time. ]

Dec 10+

[unsync]

[ Scoots in here. By which Ryuki has the misfortune to run into Mister Gloom, but he's had a little bit of time to get... situated? And with any luck, this interaction won't go as disastrously. ]

Mr. van Zieks! [ Somehow you're still alive on Happy Farmland. ] How are you and your... farm?

[winebar]

[Today he rather wishes he wasn't.]

Terrible.
[He's more succinctly negative today because he has Very Much Mood.]

[unsync]

Oh. I'm sorry.

[ Ouch. ]

What's wrong? If you don't mind me asking.

december 9th oh my god

[hypnowhip]

[Sylvando's working in the field of his beach farm when he hears that laugh... That's van Zieks, isn't it? It's nice to hear him in a good mood, but Sylvando would be lying if he said he didn't expect that man's laugh to be more...foreboding?

Oh! He's coming over...and he's smiling?! Okay, Sylvando can't hide how dumbstruck he is by this whole display. Is this how van Zieks felt when they first met?? He opens his mouth to respond, but he's too caught off guard to find any words for a moment.]

Ah- [Okay, deep breath as he approaches.] W-What is it, darling?

[Whoops, slipped with the pet name again.]

mods really handed me this insane uno reverse card

[winebar]

[Sylvando's expectations are normally correct, if van Zieks laughs at all it's curt and mirthless. But that's normally. Today is markedly abnormal. He doesn't even complain about the pet name, but then again, his demeanor right now seems far more suited for it anyway.]

I found something interesting! But it's a surprise.
[Van Zieks doesn't seem like he'd be one for surprises normally, but right now he seems excited.]

[hypnowhip]

[Sylvando isn't sure if he should be excited for what van Zieks considers to be a surprise, but you know what? He's going to choose to go along with it! If van Zieks is in a rare good mood, he wants to keep it up!

His once wavering demeanor starts to dissipate and he puts on his best smile.]

All right! Lead the way, honey!