Perhaps that portrait will disappear if you pray to the Goddess? It's worth a try.
[This is the one and only time Diluc is going to endorse the Goddess and that's because he's going to act on her behalf. Never fear, Gaku, the Darknight Hero is here to take that hideous thing away... just as soon as you're not looking. Anyway.]
Do you want any assistance? I'd rather not make you wait on me hand and foot when I'm imposing on you as it is.
[...What good is he if he can't lend a hand? The thought drifts through his mind while Gaku plates the fruit, and he takes a bite, a small one, and nods his approval.]
It's good.
[Mumble mumble. It's clear even to Diluc that he's struggling to act like 'himself,' so he finishes his piece and slides the plate back over to Gaku, shifting the subject back onto him while he's at it.]
[The face Diluc pulls is... complicated. He's exasperated, as if he understands, and shocked, as if he hasn't expected such a thing from Ellis. Moreover, he isn't that surprised when he considers what the typical career liar looks like: someone content to smile as high as their eyes with a lie on their lips, and when they do tell the truth, it's uglier than sin.
Regardless? He gets it. This is a conversation better had sitting down, so Diluc moves someplace where he can sit across from Gaku.]
It must've taken much for him to say that to you. [He doesn't know Ellis well, but he knows his kind better than anything.] What happened?
[...No, he won't shame Gaku for explaining the truth, nor admitting how it made him feel. All of this gives Diluc a clearer idea of their relationship and helps him draw parallels to his own, though the feelings involved are different. So he thinks.
Setting his chin in the palm of his head, Diluc stares at the plate between them.]
And you believed him?
[A liar's best defense mechanism is to push others back with as harsh and as cutting of words as they have at their disposal. They can only pray at the person on the other end will take their words at face value.]
I'm sure he's used to living a lie. Having someone care for him complicates matters.
[Diluc's appetite won't allow him to eat much more, but he takes another small bite out of appreciation for Gaku's efforts.]
But you're a stubborn man. You're a fool as well. You've decided to pursue him regardless, haven't you?
[Diluc's words are blunt, but they aren't harsh nor especially cutting. That camping trip was more than enough to determine the caliber of man Gaku is.]
[At that, Diluc laughs. It's thin, quiet, not the least bit derisive.]
If that's how you feel, you'll be fine. Both of you.
[You can't be with someone like Ellis without accepting who they are at their core, after all. The prettiest lies can't veil the ugly truth underneath, but Gaku sounds like he's reached his truth. With someone as stubborn as Gaku, Ellis won't have much of a choice but to reach that point as well somewhere down the line. That's the part that made Diluc laugh.
Admitting to his own messy relationship with a liar is... hard, but Gaku opened himself up to him. He has to try, if nothing else, to return the favor.]
...That ship sailed years ago, or so I thought. Unfortunately, our situations aren't that different, but I didn't come here with any desire of pursuing this person romantically— or anyone, for that matter.
[ He sure hopes so. Gaku has made his intentions to pursue Ellis totally clear, and Ellis is... he isn't sure. (and neither am i bc who knows where their weekend getaway is going)
The mention of a certain person piques Gaku's interest, however. ]
[Oof. Diluc answered too quickly and defensively, but... shaking his head, Diluc glares out the window. At least he isn't glaring at Gaku?]
...It doesn't matter how I feel about him. [So that's a yes, but Diluc's not ready to admit it yet. Not even to himself.] The issue is that he has feelings for me when he shouldn't.
[He sees that look in the corner of his eyes and hates it, thanks. It's times like these he wishes he could tolerate the mouthfeel of alcohol, because maybe then that would make this conversation more tolerable, but—]
Of course he didn't, and he never will because he's terrified that those feelings won't be reciprocated after everything he's done. For the record, I never wanted to reciprocate.
[This is the part where he starts getting frustrated because he just can't help it. There's a lot of baggage between them, Gaku.]
What would it matter if I did? We've agreed to no longer communicate with each other, and that's a line we should have crossed years ago. No good has ever come from knowing him, but that bastard had the nerve to mourn me when that woman took my life. His was the last face I saw before I died.
[And what's why he's so rattled, unable to eat or sleep or ignore Kaeya's feelings any longer.]
Don't speak so flippantly when you have no idea what damage that man has done.
[Yeah yeah, just ignore Diluc and his dramatics. No matter how angry he sounds, it's clear that anger really isn't pointed at Gaku.]
I've known Kaeya since we were children. My family took him in only for him to turn around and betray me some years later. He lied to me, and he's been lying to me his entire life. How do you expect me to humor any feelings for him?
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[This is the one and only time Diluc is going to endorse the Goddess and that's because he's going to act on her behalf. Never fear, Gaku, the Darknight Hero is here to take that hideous thing away... just as soon as you're not looking. Anyway.]
Do you want any assistance? I'd rather not make you wait on me hand and foot when I'm imposing on you as it is.
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[ He isn't having any trouble getting it into neat slices and on a plate. Soon enough, he sets it in front of Diluc. ]
Go ahead, I'll let you have the first bite.
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It's good.
[Mumble mumble. It's clear even to Diluc that he's struggling to act like 'himself,' so he finishes his piece and slides the plate back over to Gaku, shifting the subject back onto him while he's at it.]
Now then, tell me about the person you fancy.
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He's an asshole.
[ He'll let Diluc try to figure out who he means as he has a slice of melon himself. ]
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You're going to have to be more descriptive than that, especially if they aren't well-known for being an asshole.
[And he's unwilling to believe Gaku would ever fall for a man like He Xuan, so!!]
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Ellis. I like Ellis.
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[Diluc confirms, because that's reasonable enough. Ellis is cute, charming in his own way, and... hold on.]
Ellis is an asshole?
[Yeah, you're going to have to explain, Gaku. Diluc doesn't know Ellis that well.]
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[ It isn't like Gaku can really bad that mad about it since he does that for a living, but still. ]
He's been... upping the ante with everything we do, so I finally asked him what he wanted from me. He said he never even cared about me.
[ And his own visceral reaction has to do with a lot of things in his own past, but he's not about to dig into all of that with Diluc right now. ]
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Regardless? He gets it. This is a conversation better had sitting down, so Diluc moves someplace where he can sit across from Gaku.]
It must've taken much for him to say that to you. [He doesn't know Ellis well, but he knows his kind better than anything.] What happened?
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[ Some of this feels embarrassing to admit, but he doesn't think Diluc will make fun of him for it, so he has no trouble saying it. ]
He said he wanted nothing, and I asked why. That's when he said he never cared.
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Setting his chin in the palm of his head, Diluc stares at the plate between them.]
And you believed him?
[A liar's best defense mechanism is to push others back with as harsh and as cutting of words as they have at their disposal. They can only pray at the person on the other end will take their words at face value.]
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[ He pauses, having a bite of melon so he can gather his thoughts. ]
His circumstances make me believe him.
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[Diluc's appetite won't allow him to eat much more, but he takes another small bite out of appreciation for Gaku's efforts.]
But you're a stubborn man. You're a fool as well. You've decided to pursue him regardless, haven't you?
[Diluc's words are blunt, but they aren't harsh nor especially cutting. That camping trip was more than enough to determine the caliber of man Gaku is.]
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Yeah, I have. I like the real him more anyway, so I guess it works out.
[ There's a small smile on his lips. ]
Have you thought about pursuing anyone, Diluc? You seem like the kind of man who's hard to get.
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If that's how you feel, you'll be fine. Both of you.
[You can't be with someone like Ellis without accepting who they are at their core, after all. The prettiest lies can't veil the ugly truth underneath, but Gaku sounds like he's reached his truth. With someone as stubborn as Gaku, Ellis won't have much of a choice but to reach that point as well somewhere down the line. That's the part that made Diluc laugh.
Admitting to his own messy relationship with a liar is... hard, but Gaku opened himself up to him. He has to try, if nothing else, to return the favor.]
...That ship sailed years ago, or so I thought. Unfortunately, our situations aren't that different, but I didn't come here with any desire of pursuing this person romantically— or anyone, for that matter.
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The mention of a certain person piques Gaku's interest, however. ]
Who is this person?
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Kaeya.
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[ Yes. "Oh". It sure is a good thing Gaku turned down his proposition, isn't it? At least he doesn't have that to feel guilty over.
But there is something else... ]
Do you like him? I know you said you weren't going to pursue him, but...
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[Oof. Diluc answered too quickly and defensively, but... shaking his head, Diluc glares out the window. At least he isn't glaring at Gaku?]
...It doesn't matter how I feel about him. [So that's a yes, but Diluc's not ready to admit it yet. Not even to himself.] The issue is that he has feelings for me when he shouldn't.
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Gaku leans forward in his chair, a look of surprise on his face. ]
What? Does he really? He didn't tell me that.
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Of course he didn't, and he never will because he's terrified that those feelings won't be reciprocated after everything he's done. For the record, I never wanted to reciprocate.
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[ He repeats Diluc's own words back to him, understanding dawning on his own features. ]
But you do anyway, don't you?
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What would it matter if I did? We've agreed to no longer communicate with each other, and that's a line we should have crossed years ago. No good has ever come from knowing him, but that bastard had the nerve to mourn me when that woman took my life. His was the last face I saw before I died.
[And what's why he's so rattled, unable to eat or sleep or ignore Kaeya's feelings any longer.]
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Of course he would mourn you. I don't know what you expected when he has feelings for you.
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[Yeah yeah, just ignore Diluc and his dramatics. No matter how angry he sounds, it's clear that anger really isn't pointed at Gaku.]
I've known Kaeya since we were children. My family took him in only for him to turn around and betray me some years later. He lied to me, and he's been lying to me his entire life. How do you expect me to humor any feelings for him?
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