No, actually, I don't know, you kissed me without preamble so I'm not sure if there's an issue with my penchant for compartmentalization. [Again with the big words.]
[He covers his face with both his hands, wheezing again.]
Preamble-- "a preliminary or preparatory statement; an introduction". In law, "the introductory part of a statute or deed, stating its purpose, aims, and justification". You didn't warn me or give me any kind of indication kissing was something about to occur, so I have no idea how you meant it be received. Compartmentalization literally means "the division of something into sections or categories". [He does not say that it's a trauma response, because he does not want to open that can of worms, no ma'am.]
( Those explanations helped!! Sort of. She knows the words by definition now? But she still doesn't understand why he's dividing things into categories. He'll have figured this out easily, but she's not that kind of person. She just Does Things. )
Ah ... ( She swallows, feeling a pang of guilt over her impulsive kiss. )
Okay, I think I understand the definitions at least ... ( Hmm ... ) So, if I wanted to kiss you, I should ask first? I mean, uh ...
That's if you wanted to kiss me too, I mean ... ( How could she not have considered this!! (Because her head is full of air.))
[He does, actually, understand that his compartmentalization is Fucking Weird, but that's trauma, for you. His ears sear scarlet under his shaggy hair again.]
Don't feel poorly for the impulsive decision, I could truly stand to take a page from your book and overthink quite a bit less than I do. [He frowns at his kneecaps.] It..., mmmn. It isn't so much that I want you to ask, it's... [He trails off, frowning quite hard at his mattress beneath them.] This is a bit like the notion of things just being called "French" for no reason, I don't... really know why, but being... informed, makes this easier.
[Because he's absolutely wholeass 100% convinced that the only reason she could possibly have to kiss him is to practice for someone else, and he needs to check out of his own head to not be bothered by that.]
If that's how you like things to be, I'm more than okay with that. ( Amber blushes, rubbing one of her fingers down her cheek in an idle, shy gesture. ) To be honest with you ... I kinda haven't done that to someone before. Just kissed someone like that, I mean. Sure, I'm cuddly, and love giving my friends hugs, but ...
... I don't know. ( A deep breath. ) That was a first for me.
( Now that's a word she knows how to use in a sentence. It's also a word that leaves a funny twist in her stomach. )
If experimenting is what you want to call it, sure, but ... ( Is it what she considers it to be, though? Amber isn't certain she has an answer for that, but she'll try. ) I didn't kiss you just to play around. ( ???? Maybe that's a start???????? )
( He's welcome to take that as it is. Maybe it's a crush. Maybe she's fond of him! Who knows!! All she does know is that Akechi is pretty and sweet and she wanted to kiss him. )
[He has no idea what to do with that. This was transactional, wasn't it? Like everything else here. His expression pinches further and he sits a little straighter before curling back into himself against the wall, processing slowly.]
...you have poor taste, then. [When in doubt: insult.]
[He hates this a little bit, because he's conflicted. It becomes a waiting game, now, for Amber to realize her mistake in thinking he's worth being liked, in whatever capacity she likes him. Simultaneously, he can't be sure how to react, himself-- does he push her away, to soften the blow when she inevitably catches wise? Does he let her in, so it happens faster? Does he do nothing so she loses interest? He closes his eyes, focusing on the thundering sound of his blood through his veins, the way his heartbeat makes his pulse points thud terribly.]
...I suppose sharing a bed implies sleeping in it, overall.
( There's nothing else she can do apart from tell him the truth - which is what she did. It might've felt a bit too soon, and she can feel the fog of insecurity clouding around him, but Amber is confident that she made the right choice. )
Oh! Yeah. Right! ( She says, even though she is wide awake with thanks to that coffee. The woman knows there's no chance in hell she'll be sleeping any time soon, but she can try. Amber lifts the sheets, slotting her body into his bed while laying on her side. Her long curled locks of dark hair sprawl out all around her where she lays, bright golden eyes peering up at him while she smiles. Her pyjamas cling to her curvy body as well. )
I'm not all that tired, really. But that's my own fault! Coffee adventure and all, ahaha ... still, I have no regrets. It was really fun and tasted great!
[The idea of sleeping right now appeals to him about as much as a lobotomy, but it was a good escape from how awkward he'd made conversation. So he follows suit, turning the opposite direction and sliding under the sheets and bedspread, curled slightly on his side and as close to the edge of the mattress as he can possibly be to avoid any accidental contact.]
...I've likely slept despite coffee numerous times, it's so ingrained in my system.
( While the thought of cuddling with him had been lingering in the back of her mind, she ultimately decides to resist pursuing him to avoid rejection. His body language said enough from the way in which he turned to face the other way, creating a sizeable gap in the bed between them. In the end, she decides to turn around face the wall, pulling the sheet around her body. )
That's okay. Uh ... ( Maybe it's best to leave things here for now. He didn't seem all that enthused when she said she liked him, and ... there's not much else to say. He doesn't want to be near her, and she can't do anything about that. There's a pang of soreness in her chest that she elects to ignore. )
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crescentview2023-01-03 05:56 pm
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No, actually, I don't know, you kissed me without preamble so I'm not sure if there's an issue with my penchant for compartmentalization. [Again with the big words.]
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... "Preamble"!? ( SHE SQUINTS. ) I-I still don't know what you mean! ( AT LEAST SHE'S HONEST. )
So, right, okay. I kissed you, now you've "compartmentalised" it into your kiss brain section ...
...
Please tell me that I got it right ...
no subject
Preamble-- "a preliminary or preparatory statement; an introduction". In law, "the introductory part of a statute or deed, stating its purpose, aims, and justification". You didn't warn me or give me any kind of indication kissing was something about to occur, so I have no idea how you meant it be received. Compartmentalization literally means "the division of something into sections or categories". [He does not say that it's a trauma response, because he does not want to open that can of worms, no ma'am.]
no subject
Ah ... ( She swallows, feeling a pang of guilt over her impulsive kiss. )
Okay, I think I understand the definitions at least ... ( Hmm ... ) So, if I wanted to kiss you, I should ask first? I mean, uh ...
That's if you wanted to kiss me too, I mean ... ( How could she not have considered this!!
(Because her head is full of air.))no subject
Don't feel poorly for the impulsive decision, I could truly stand to take a page from your book and overthink quite a bit less than I do. [He frowns at his kneecaps.] It..., mmmn. It isn't so much that I want you to ask, it's... [He trails off, frowning quite hard at his mattress beneath them.] This is a bit like the notion of things just being called "French" for no reason, I don't... really know why, but being... informed, makes this easier.
[Because he's absolutely wholeass 100% convinced that the only reason she could possibly have to kiss him is to practice for someone else, and he needs to check out of his own head to not be bothered by that.]
no subject
If that's how you like things to be, I'm more than okay with that. ( Amber blushes, rubbing one of her fingers down her cheek in an idle, shy gesture. ) To be honest with you ... I kinda haven't done that to someone before. Just kissed someone like that, I mean. Sure, I'm cuddly, and love giving my friends hugs, but ...
... I don't know. ( A deep breath. ) That was a first for me.
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Mmn. As I've mentioned, I'm not opposed to experimentation. [So why does he sound like he's dissociating out of his own skin??]
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( Now that's a word she knows how to use in a sentence. It's also a word that leaves a funny twist in her stomach. )
If experimenting is what you want to call it, sure, but ... ( Is it what she considers it to be, though? Amber isn't certain she has an answer for that, but she'll try. ) I didn't kiss you just to play around. ( ???? Maybe that's a start???????? )
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...what other reason could you possibly have?
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( He's welcome to take that as it is. Maybe it's a crush. Maybe she's fond of him! Who knows!! All she does know is that Akechi is pretty and sweet and she wanted to kiss him. )
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...you have poor taste, then. [When in doubt: insult.]
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Well I don't think I do. ( Can't argue with that, little man!! )
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...I suppose sharing a bed implies sleeping in it, overall.
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Oh! Yeah. Right! ( She says, even though she is wide awake with thanks to that coffee. The woman knows there's no chance in hell she'll be sleeping any time soon, but she can try. Amber lifts the sheets, slotting her body into his bed while laying on her side. Her long curled locks of dark hair sprawl out all around her where she lays, bright golden eyes peering up at him while she smiles. Her pyjamas cling to her curvy body as well. )
I'm not all that tired, really. But that's my own fault! Coffee adventure and all, ahaha ... still, I have no regrets. It was really fun and tasted great!
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...I've likely slept despite coffee numerous times, it's so ingrained in my system.
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That's okay. Uh ... ( Maybe it's best to leave things here for now. He didn't seem all that enthused when she said she liked him, and ... there's not much else to say. He doesn't want to be near her, and she can't do anything about that. There's a pang of soreness in her chest that she elects to ignore. )
Goodnight, Goro.